Thursday, May 8, 2008

The horrors of blind dating abound in my life.

Of course there was another "news" report on NPR this morning about how infertile women my age are. Damn, and good thing someone reminded me that any children I may be lucky enough to conceive will probably have some genetic defect too!

It is not as if I haven't been participating in the creation of one more happy, healthy, spoiled american child. I have!I have been out on EVERY set-up that has been offered to me. I was EVEN set up with some prospective babydaddies while up north for my beloved Grammy's funeral.

First guy was shorter than me. I'm about 5'4" so I don't know, I guess I'm a freak. My sister, who really IS short, tells everybody I'm 5'7" so at least I wasn't as tall as the dude expected. But the point is, NOBODY told me how SHORT Mr Personality was. Mr P, who is in the military and was also an only child of a single mom, made it clear to me that he has VERY high standards and THAT'S why he's single. Oh, I guess it doesn't have anything to do with the fact that my GAYDAR was screaming its torchsong alarm that a Gay was in range, and I don't mean the bartender. Poor Mr P. He has to pretend like he's straight, but it's so obviious he's totally gay. Then he expects me to act like I don't know he's gay? I started treating him like a girlfriend and we got along fabulously. Thankfully, that was the extent of the chemistry, and I'm now babysitting his dog while he is deployed.

Next guy had a mullet and is obsessed with Nascar.. 'Nuff said.

One of my good friends at work has resorted to trying to produce a love match where there is none. She insists that there is a flirtation going on between me and a strapping young stallion 10 or 15 years my junior who is a sort-of recent addition to our office. In fact, those insinuations have been flying around about me and every other single guy in the office. Dear God, I do hope I'm not so desperate that I'm flirting with every loose man in my vicinity.

1 comment:

NewsCat said...

Well at least you have friends who try to set you up. My friend pool is of the kind "if there was an attractive single man around I'd be trying to set MYSELF up with him."