Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Dating debacle with Heracles

Saturday night I met Heracles at a trendy restaurant/bar. We sat outside on the patio and had a great time chatting. When we parted to walk to our respective cars, he threw out a casual goodbye. I had invited him to go to a convention that I had free tickets for, and he seemed halfway interested.

Sunday rolled around, and I was caught up with some work which caused me to delay meeting at the convention. When we arrived, it was closing up. Heracles was unimpressed with my lack of planning and nonchalantly said, "See ya later MH." Yeah right, I thought.

I immediately switched gears and drove directly to a smallish new grocery store near my house. It was refreshing to discover their selection of cheap bottled wine. Knowing that I might require one within hours, I loaded my arm basket up with the cheapest of them all. My cell phone rang. On the other end was an overexcited friend, wondering how my DATE with HERACLES turned out.

I launched into a caustic impersonation of Heracles going, "Seee ya leeeeater, MH" rolling my eyes as if I were an oaf without any ability to keep my tongue in my mouth. I grumbled, "I'll never hear from THAT guy again. Next!"

I was also half-heartedly considering a bottle with a pretty label and a higher price when the chilling feeling of being watched crept up my neck. Some dude was staring at me from the end of the aisle. I turned my back, flipping my hair in concert with it and rolled my eyes again, hoping my "Move on, bucko" message transmitted properly. Dude didn't notice and walked towards me. I filled my friend in on the developments all up in the aisle here. "Keep moving, friend," I joked to her as the blurred form of Dude strolled past.

Seconds later, I heard, "MH!" I looked. It was Heracles. Incredulous, I said, "What are you doing here?" He had a bottle of apple cider vinegar and some vitamin water. "I live almost across the street from here," he said.

"Because I live just down the street."
"I am literally (?) right over there, you can practically see my window."
"Yeah. Well nice to see you. Ok!"
"Ok I better go, I have LOTS of stuff to do right now."
"Ok see ya laaaaaaater."

Horrifying. I felt like a big old biatch for sure. Did he hear me complaining and making fun of him? I was positive he did.

Later, I received an email from him apologizing for that episode and attempting to convince me that he was NOT stalking me, even though I "probably wouldn't believe" him. So, I asked, you didn't hear my conversation? Nope, but he was sorry for interrupting it.


We made a date for next week.