Saturday, August 13, 2011

A Woman's Legacy

My mom passed away on Monday.

Of course I have felt so much since then that I probably would not have felt, had my mom been normal. But she wasn't normal. She was a con artist, a prescription drug addict, and bi polar. She was impossible to get along with, she could be vindictive, she was mostly over dramatic about everything and always self-centered.

For my own sanity, I distanced myself. I never contacted her. If she called or texted, I waited until I considered myself ready for a difficult conversation before calling her back. Talking to my mom required endless tongue-biting and patience. If she wasn't flinging a complaint, she was engaging in an uninterrupted lecture which lasted several minutes at a time.

She didn't take care of her body. She smoked pot, cigarettes, and at times crack. She snorted coke years ago for a pretty long time. She drank, she ate very little that was good for her, and she loved her many prescriptions of opiates, benzos et al. Mom had heart failure, lupus, breast cancer ( was in remission at the time of her death ), rheumatoid arthritis, and more.

sad day.

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